When to know to let it go.

      You know. I'm a strong perosn. I'm a very strong willed and opinionated person. I work hard for everything I own and I will do so for the rest of my life. I know that we're not suppose to be writing on this yet but I figured. I just got home from work and this thoughts still on my mind after a rough and stressful day so I thought I'd just kinda let it all flow out. 

      I'm never one to just give up. I mean i will fight and fight and fight to keep something continuous, but there comes a time when you have to look at what you fighting for and think long and hard........ Is all of this worth it? How is this benefiting me? How is it helping me and my goals toward the future. And the biggest question. What am I even fighting for? I had to ask myself these questions today and the answer I came to wasn't exactly something I wanted. But I knew I had to do for myself.

       The hardest thing for me that I was fighting for was to fix something. Something that before I had even touched it I had already known it would need a lot of mending. But I was in way over my head! I felt like I was trying to fix a half broken vase but while I was busy fixing it I was forgetting about my own tasks inlife I wasn't fulfilling and somewhere along the line I dropped my case and shattered it completely. I couldn't quite put it back together again but you best believe I kept on trying. But it just came to a point where I was tired of fighting with the glue and sticky fingers and stress. And I threw in the white flag. Not because I wanted to, or because I was forced to. Because I knew I had to. I had to do it for myself. 

      I'm really kinda taken aghast for a moment while I ponder my decision and the feelings in my heart, chest, and mind. Every part of me wants something different and I can never come to a single conclusion that'll please all of me. 

      I guess what I'm saying is, is that everyone will tell you how to fight, fight, fight, but nobody every really teaches you how to know when it's okay to give up, you just have to learn by yourself in trial and error I guess. Well I guess I should probably tend to my other homework since it's currently 1:13!